I haven’t come across any evidence that explicitly says it is mandatory upon the couple to have children in their marriage. Culturally, psychologically, emotionally, and sunnatically, you will hardly find any sensible couple who chose not to have children – couple with the joy and happiness that comes from it. The point here is that Islam never stipulate the number of children a couple can decide to have.
Here comes a common issue among us which we regard as a theological one; and this is the issue of fixing the number of children one decides to have out of fear of poverty to take care of them and the family at large.
Certainly, there are legitimate reasons (be it medical or culture related) that may warrant a couple to stipulate the number of children they want and the intervals between their births.
The objective of family planning – following the common meaning – is: spacing out pregnancies, preserving the mother’s health, protecting her against numerous harm resulting from frequent pregnancies and sequential deliveries, or allowing the mother time to devote herself to raising her existing offspring.
However, birth control as a permanent means of ending the possibility of conception contradicts Islam and its objective of preserving human procreation until whatever time.
The withdrawal method (coitus interruptus) is undoubtedly a permissible means of contraception just like other pure and safe means too (so far it does not lead to killing the embryo after its formation). Consult your (Muslim) doctor to know the best with lesser side effect. I’ll only suggest you go for natural herbs and prophetic medicines instead (e.g Neem oil).
I’m actually not interested in discussing the Islamic ruling as regard Contraception and its various forms; it seems we have a major agreement upon that.
Rather, the focus of this article is on fixing the number of children an individual wants to have in relation with fear of poverty, and analogizing it to abortion.
We often quote the verse 31 of Suratu al-Israa to condemn the one who wishes to postpone having children out of fear of poverty (being poor); claiming such person lacks adequate faith and reliance in Allah. I hold this opinion to be a partial and weak one that cannot be established everywhere for every people.
The verse Allah says:
وَلَا تَقْتُلُوا أَوْلَادَكُمْ خَشْيَةَ إِمْلَاقٍ نَّحْنُ نَرْزُقُهُمْ وَإِيَّاكُمْ إِنَّ قَتْلَهُمْ كَانَ خِطْئًا كَبِيرًا
Meaning: “And do not kill your children for fear of poverty; We give them sustenance and yourselves (too); surely to kill them is a great wrong.”
I posit that, among the legitimate reasons an individual can postpone or fix the number of children he wishes to have is when in a situation of financial mess.
The above verse was revealed prior to the people of Makkah who did kill their children (after birthing them) for the fear of what they will feed on. They did kill them; in which Allah later prohibited. This cannot be analogized to a poor person who hasn’t brought any child to this world at all. He didn’t kill anyone.
This verse will rather fit the individual who commits abortion out of fear of poverty.
Some of the Hanafiyyah and Shaafi’iyah scholars who permitted abortion if the embryo has not been formed yet further disagreed upon the days it take the embryo to form – 40 or 120 days. Their view cannot be deemed acceptable on a general platform; it should only be considered when it has been proven that the life of the mother (or the nursing child in any case it maybe) is endangered; and not the one who committed zina and still wants to kill the innocent soul out of shame.
It should be categorally stated that the one who went broke after fulfilling his responsibilities may actually not be termed a poor person. Just as there exists a difference between a poor person with little or no source of income and a person who fears poverty out of the economy of the state (country) he lives. If any of these two decide to fix or postpone the number of children they wish to have out of poverty and adequate care for the children, then, this is not prohibited.
The verse of al-Israa and al-An’aam is a response to those attempting to kill their children (infanticide). In a country where the economy is literally crashing, new born children in some homes are simply starving to death. This is the reality of the verse.
Consider a Teacher in Lagos state who earns only ₦40,000 monthly, with a wife and 4 or more children; I can’t fathom how such person will foot his accommodation bills, medical, transportations, education of his children and other responsibilities. If such “poor” person decides not to have children further, I do not see anything wrong here. Should he give birth to children he won’t be capable of taking care? Likewise the one who fears poverty due to the economy of the land or as a result to give adequate care to the few children he has been blessed with.
If we could agree that the one who is not financially fit shouldn’t go for marriage, it is far better to accept such for the individual who fears poverty and fix/did not want to give birth further – by adopting family planning.
In some part of Africa, some people just give birth to children without control, they care less about them, send them to “Islamiyyah” afterwards, and eventually turn street beggers; never will poverty be eradicated in such a way.
No Muslim should ever belie or doubt the capability and might of Allah; the one who thinks he has, Allah can take it all from him within a second; but relying on Allah does not mean not taking neccessary precautions and calculations. Being realistic doesn’t make one weak in faith/reliance in Allah. The Prophet will only be proud of children (Muslims) well trained upon Islamic teachings.
One Response
Well articulated.